A review: Bending reality, Victoria Song
An approximate 4(ish) minute read time.
How I review books:
Top notes – a first impression. A practical summary of everything you need to know, including a completely biased view on how much I liked the cover.
Middle notes – the foundation. Readability / structure.
Base notes – the impression. Interpretation and everything else.
Top notes:
190 pages (inclusive of end notes).
My copy of Bending Reality (BR) is in hardback. I really like the cover but I loved the book without the cover. I have no idea why, there was something about the blue and white, it reminded me of a notebook (and notes were made).
Once again my weird review of how the pages feel… the pages feel NICE and for the detail no one asked for, you can annotate and underline the pages and the ink doesn’t show on the back of the other page.
There is an introduction, 12 chapters and a conclusion.
There are exercises which take you to Victoria’s website do them ALL. I would also recommend following Victoria Song on Instagram.
Middle notes:
Books like BR tend to find me at the right time. This book found me via a podcast and within 10 minutes of hearing Victoria speak I purchased her book. I treat books like BR as a personal journal (which is why no one can borrow them) I fold pages, bookmark and make notes. If you think that annotating books is a crime – arrest me.
With books like these the journey of reading them is deeply personal, there would be no point in me going into the chapters, story or anything else in between. What I will tell you a tale of - is my feelings and conclusions whilst reading this book and now a week after finishing BR.
I am UK based and I ordered BR on Blackwell’s. It cost me £28.00 – my order number had 111 in it so you know *justified spending acknowledged by the universe*. I have read a lot of books on spirituality, well-being and general personal development – BR was a challenging read, not practically, the; structure, writing and exercises were great - but because of what the book ultimately makes you do – which is to feel. The challenge of feeling will be a personal thing, this is the sort of book you re-read and each time take something different from the pages.
This is the first time I have read BR. I annotated, folded pages, underlined sentences and put little stars everywhere. I just kept thinking ‘I need to come back to this and read it again’ but there wasn’t a page in the book without this note - so I just need to re-read the whole thing.
Base notes:
It is all about living in expansion or contraction.
Victoria takes teachings that are already available and packages them up in a very accessible way, she adds her own unique systems, teachings, methods and thoughts. The book feels like the place it was written from – expansion (makes sense when you read it). For a bit of background I am both a logical and spiritual person, these two things exist happily together and my approach to my personal development now combines both these things. Both parts of my brain liked this book.
This book found me after 2+ years of ‘work’ (mental, physical, theoretical, practical and everything else in between). This work started with therapy and has continued on from there. To note I am a huge advocate for destigmatising mental health, physical health and metal health being of equal importance and therapy. For me therapy was the most important decision I made for myself and is the foundation I have built on since. Like I always say I am not a professional, I am just telling my story and my experiences. If you are ever concerned about your mental or physical health contact a professional and reach out to your support system.
This two year process for me has pushed me outside of my comfort zone and has been quite confronting, making me address things I haven’t wanted to. It took and is taking energy but to do this work was the best decision I have ever made. Today I feel like my foundation is built, I have goals I want to achieve and a positive impact that I want to make, but as a human I still have bad days.
Recently felt I was doing ‘well’ because in many ways I am, but I had unconsciously separated my emotions into good and bad. I had been told in the past I feel too much or too intensely, so I had concluded it was a bad thing and had tried to dampen my experience of my feelings. More recently feeling angry felt inconvenient and annoying, so I tried to move past it as quickly as possible. If you listen to Victoria on podcasts, follow her Instagram or read her book it is all about feeling your way through. This has been a huge change in how I approach feelings and my relationship with them - I now allow myself to feel without; rationalising, dampening or trying to ignore my feelings because ‘I don’t have time for this’. Just asking myself how I feel throughout the day or asking whether I feel expanded or contracted has shown me parts of my life I want to change, what is a priority for me and where I want my energy to go.
Whilst reading BR I found myself needing to put the book down at several points. This was usually when I felt a breakthrough or I felt something make sense that hadn’t before. The beauty of BR is whatever resonated with me whilst reading this book - will not be the same things that resonate for you. This is a personal journey. There is no right or wrong – all I know is I have gifted the Power of Now to many people in my life and now I have found my new book to gift.
Parts of this book reminded me of the power of being me, following my dreams and how to not only connect with myself but how to experience my feelings and untangle some feelings that I have skimmed over. I keep thinking 2 things regularly now; ‘does this expand or contract me’ and ‘to not place my power outside me’.
This book is going to be added to my ‘revisit’ pile when I need to remind myself to; commit to myself, trust myself, and be brave and follow my dreams. Much as when I re-read my favourite book on minimalism goodbye things (review here) get rid of a load of clothes and stay out of TK Maxx.
I started BR holding myself back in a few areas of my life, the universe likes to kick me up the arse though various means this book being one of them, it dismantled my view on my feelings and pieced it back together again. It felt like this book was the missing puzzle piece to what I have learnt so far.
All I can say is – go into reading BR with an open mind and see what resonates for you. I do not believe personal development takes one form or that it has an end - it is a journey. This book found me at the right time and I am so grateful that it did – maybe it will find you at the right time too?
Speak soon.
Ms ASK